I think I miss Him most when I’m sick.
At the moment I’ve got an awful head cold, which I’m fighting very hard to keep just a head cold, rather than something worse. (This Little Bird has shit to do and doesn’t have time to be sick.) Now, when I’m sick, there isn’t much communication anyhow. His focus when I’m sick is for me to get well, so He doesn’t tax me more by communicating. But He is there, and there’s something very comforting about that.
Right now He’s about the equivalent of a 12-year-old; the horns are just starting to grow in, little nubs, and girls still kinda have cooties. Mother Danu is still the overriding presence for me, and I’m grateful for Her… but I still miss Him. Our connection was just really starting to build back up, and when I’m sick, it snaps back down so I can recoup. Frustrating, that. Just a little.
So I sit here, a roll of toilet paper to stem the tide from my leaky nose, a large bottle filled with water to help flush my system, a teacup from my earlier dose of Sleepytime, and some non-drowsy cold medicine waiting for me to take one more dose before I fall into bed to try and sleep again. I resist the urge to wash dishes, or weave chain, or do laundry or anything else my restless self really wants to do because I’m BORED. But I’m trying to take a cue from my cat (who had teeth pulled yesterday) and rest. Then sleep. Then rest some more. And recover. Because if I don’t have time to be sick, this is going to be the fastest way to not be sick anymore.
Sometimes the fuzzy ones – even the silly ones – are smarter than we are.
I miss You, Sir. Just a few more weeks to go, so off I go to rest some more so I can not be sick when You come back.